Tomorrow we are heading to Spain. This is our big family vacation we do each year, so all 19 of us will converge in Barcelona for 5 nights. Daniel and I are going one night early so we can beat jetlag and be prepared to help everyone else on arrival day. Stephen went early with his family to London and Paris and will end in Barcelona. My parents will be in and out, and everyone else disperses at the end of the trip. Daniel and I head south to Seville, Grenada, Andalusia area, then up to Madrid then home.

I'm pretty excited. I've been trying to kick this stupid cough for like 4 weeks now. Originally I had a sore throat, cough, stuffy nose after traveling to California for Megan's graduation. And that went on so long that I finally went to a doctor who said I probably had the flu, but now it was like a pneumonia bacterial infection, so I did a round of antibiotics. I'm still not 100% better so I went back to the doctor and she said it was just post-infectious lingering cough. She gave me steroids to help kick it faster, so now I'm roid raging. Better than coughing on an airplane for 10 hours. I have cough drops, a cough suppressant pill, and a mask if that should become a problem, but I'm feeling better today finally.

I try not to make my blogs just a recounting of every medical malady I encounter. But that's pretty much the narrative now. While we are away I will be turning 45 years old. I am not bringing my book of secrets with me because it would be a little heavy, so I'll have to read my 1, 5, and 10 year predictions when we get home. The 10 year predictions have been pretty wildly inaccurate. I couldn't begin to predict what will be going on 10 years from now so I stopped trying. I filled the book and that will be the only volume in existence. It was a fun activity for a decade or so.

Okay, who knows, I might even take a picture when I'm in Spain and post it here. I try to take at least one picture per day when I'm traveling, that's my goal. I also said I was going to try to take a picture of as many obscure locations as possible for maximum views on Google Maps so maybe I'll remember to do that. Wish me luck and I'll czech you all on the flip side!

I wasn't going to blog today since I already posted a picture of our new faucet locks. But then I realized what today is. Today is the 22nd anniversary of when I started working at my job. It's an odd anniversary to take special note of but this one seems poignant because I was 22 years old when I started working there. Okay, technically I was like 22 years and 11 months old, but still, this marks the year when I have worked there just as long as I haven't. That's wild.

What could I go back and tell that kid after his first day? I'll never forget getting there in my recently purchased Sears suit, and sitting in a conference room all day learning the most pointless orientation facts. They let us go early, but suggested we all go sit at our desks, set up our new laptops, and fill out some HR paperwork. I had neither a laptop nor a desk to sit at, so I said, "Should I just sit in the bathroom until 5?" Then I laughed and walked out the door and went home.

When my mom got home I was doing the backstroke in the pool and she screamed, "Did you get fired on your first day?!" And I said no, I just ... left. Ha. Although, I just went back to 2004 to read my first blog after starting my job and I said that my parents were out of town and would be until Friday, which kept me from having to answer a million questions when I get home. So either my parents left on a Tuesday or my memory of that day is entirely fabricated. Oh well, I'm certain that exchange took place at some point. But alas, I never did get fired and 22 years later I'm still going strong.

I guess I wouldn't really have any solid advice for me at age 22. I pretty much did it my way and it worked out. That's half charm, half privilege. And it got me where I wanted to be, so I guess I would just give the same advice I always say I'd give if I could time travel, "It all turns out okay."

I keep telling myself I need to be more narrative on my refreshed blog. I used to document the most meaningless things but they are more fun to read years later than anything monumental that I might otherwise remember. So here we go.

Two weekends ago, we drove my parents up to Oklahoma City for our niece Ann Marie's college graduation. She got her undergrad in 3 years with a 4.0 average. That apple fell nowhere near my tree! She is immediately going back to get her masters. So impressed. We stopped at Winstar on the way home and all pooled our money into a high stakes slot machine. I think it was like $30 per pull. After a few pulls, we hit a mildly good reward, doubled our money, and cashed out. I was happy to stop there but after lunch my mom wanted to gamble just a little bit more, so Daniel and I each put a hundy into a nearby machine and promptly frittered away not only our winnings but as much in losses. C'est la view.

Then last weekend, we hung out with the Allistralian. We had a great time getting to know her daughter who is gregarious to say the least. Her husband is addicted to AI, on a level far beyond what I've described. And he only uses it with the microphone like a conversation. And he always adds a ton of extra info. "I am sitting here with my wife and she is giving me a dirty look because she thinks I use AI too much, anyway, how do I heat up a chicken breast?" So funny.

Now we're sitting here wasting time until we can head to DFW for a flight to Sacramento. Now Michael's daughter Megan is graduating high school. We did have a super early flight but then AA moved it several hours later, so we won't have a huge buffer to get there and get situated, but should still have plenty of time without rushing -- IFFF our flight takes off on time. The last time we did this a couple years ago we just sat and sat and sat in the airport until we missed Kelsey's graduation and arrived at like 10pm. So we'll see.

Oh, in other news, we THINK we saw Muffin with a baby. At least we for sure saw her touching noses and letting a baby squirrel climb all over her. If it wasn't her baby then I don't think she would be doing that. We whistled at her to come get a treat, and the baby noped the fuck out of here, and Muffin sauntered over and enjoyed lunch. I wish she was training her babies to come to us so we could get some generational squirrel insurance.

I hope everyone has big plans today for getting sunburnt, eating watermelon, and watching fireworks. Me? I'm sitting in my very air conditioned apartment watching a show about redneks in Oklahoma noodling for fish. This is where they catch gigantic catfish using their hands as bait. It has really made me think about Europe a lot and how I wish I was there. I went to my Swedish chat site thing and started saving off pictures of guys with wicked awesome hair just in case my membership has an expiration date and I can't do this at a later date.

Lately it seems like everything that I'm about is for something in the future. I'm working on this future hair. I can't wait to get my future furniture in my future apartment. In reality, none of it will ever, ever happen given my current spending habits. I am down to like no money whatsoever and since I just paid my rent late (on account of this being a Sunday and tomorrow being a holiday ... FUCK!) I'm going to owe like an additional 100 bucks that I don't have. Frustration.

I spent all day yesterday painting Ryan S■■■'s apartment. We didn't get done but we did do a LOT. It looks totally awesome ... or rather it will, soon. I'll snap a pic of it sometime for all of you to see. Speaking of pictures, I got my Europe pictures back forever ago I just haven't had the patience to post them yet. I'll do that within the next year. Later skaters.

P.S. You all know my birthday is on Wednesday, the 6th, right? K

I'm about to save you all a lot of money, and keep you from wasting precious hours of your day. I have several hints to throw your way (Heloise style -- except these are actually applicable). The first deals with a movie that was released today called Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde.

Whatever you do, do not go see this movie. Under no circumstances should anyone pay to view this trash. If I had to pick one word to describe it, I would have to politely decline the proposition in favor of a slew of slurs. And it goes like this: This movie was trite, cheezy, slapstick crap. It was nonsequitor, unbelievable, and completely contrived. The characters were 2-dimensional props without brains whose decisions and feelings were unfounded and motivations unclear. Their main source of comedy was sexism, gay bashing, and all around stereotypes. The plot, albeit thin and patched together, managed to hold together long enough to suck throughout the entire length of the film. At one point I desperately tried to fall asleep, and at another, I completely had to leave the theater for a breather from the idiocy.

I may sound exceedingly critical of this light hearted movie, but there is a reason. I loved the first installment of this storyline. I thought the characters were great, and the idea behind it: to overcome adversity by being yourself, was a great message. Part 2 had none of this. No characters, no adversity, no message, no nothing. Absolute cinematic crap. I reiterate: Under no circumstances should anyone ever pay to see this movie.

The next 3 advisories deal with restaurants in College Station. After the lackluster theater experience, Allison and I decided to hit up a new restaurant to change the course of the evening. We began with Ozona Ranch. I don't have a huge complaint about that place except that the menu sucked. We sat, perused the selections, bitched about how the menu sucked, and then excused ourselves.

We headed to the new Mexican restaurant that now occupies the location that no restaurant can stay alive in for more than a couple of months. I don't remember the name of it. We walked in to be faced with a large sign at the front door that says, 'We are not responsible for lost or stolen items.' As if that isn't a red flag that this place is just a tad shady. So, while holding my wallet, we walked in and asked for a menu. Without even having to read it we knew we wanted to leave. There was a stereotypical Mexican man with a sombrero playing god awful Tejano music on a keyboard to entertain the guests. Not gonna do it. Especially when I'm already running the risk of being robbed.

So ... we walked over to Karrie's Stacked Enchiladas. Great food. Don't get me wrong. Really enjoyed the food. The staff, however, dear friends, left much to be desired. The hostess was hopped up on something. God knows what, but she would not leave us the hell alone. The bus boy kept trying to take Allison's plate before she was done eating so he could sneak a peak (all so slyly) at her breasts. I asked a waitress for a straw, and she all but fisted it into my drink for me, to which my response was to take it out and place it delicately on the ground. The manager was creepy. And another waiter wouldn't stop sprinting around the restaurant to bring people drinks and food. Good effort, but it kept making me think the building was on fire. Long story short, I'll never go to this place ever again.

So there you have it. You are very welcome. I save you money, I save you time. Tomorrow we depart for the river, and then Saturday night we will be partying like rockstars in downtown Austin. If any of you are going to be in the area, let me know. Ciao bellos.