Happy Easter everybody. Good luck out there searching for eggs (?) made of chocolate (?) that came out the butt (?) of a rabbit (?). I'm not 100% sure about the mechanics of that, but nonetheless, have fun. I'm just hoping this means that the gym will be close to empty.

Speaking of, there is this new scourge at the gym. It only started recently, but it is spreading. Grown men with ear buds in listening to music at full volume -- SINGING ALONG. WTF. Like OUT LOUD. And as annoying as singing would be to people around you, when you can't hear yourself at all, it's a special kind of horrible. I know of at least 5 people off the top of my head that I will not get on the treadmill next to or sit next to on the stretching mat because I know they'll break out into winching, breathy, high pitched song the second I do. I wish I was more confrontational, so I could just tap them on the shoulder and ask, "What the fuck is wrong with you?" but instead I just shoot dirty looks that are not understood.

Normally for Easter lately we get together with my parents and have a smorgasbord of food from Honey Baked Hams. I even have a rewards number on honeybaked.com. But between you and me, all of their food is garbage. I mean, the ham is okay, but they also have these boxed sides and everything is just horrible. My dad had a little procedure on Friday and wasn't sure if he'd be up for it, so I was more than happy to accept their decline of getting together. Daniel did ask me what he should buy at the store as a special treat and I said he could buy some eggs and I'll make deviled eggs with salmon roe. That will be our homage to Easter.

Another successful Febrehab is done. Though I must admit this one was really easy. I only gave up sugar and caffeine in addition to alcohol. Caffeine is pretty easy for me. I really like the caffeine free teas from Whole Foods. A little fruity beginning to the day isn't half bad. And while we do devolve into the habit of having one brown butter chocolate chip cookie after dinner 3 days per week, it wasn't that big of a deal to give it up. That's pretty much the only dedicated source of sugar in my life.

Nevertheless, it is always good to take a little break. I was telling people this year though that it's not even really the alcohol I miss. It's the ritual. The habit. There's no physical addiction, it's just such a nice punctuation on the week. Like, it's Friday, the work week is over, let's go out and have a glass of champagne with dinner to celebrate living life. And I guess we should be doing a bit more of that while we can, before we all get drafted into WWIII....

In other news, after having just poo-pooed AI in my last post, I have used it more and more in my personal life. I used to sit around and wonder about stuff. Now I just ask AI. And maybe it's good to sometimes just have unanswered thought experiments, but I really like discussing ridiculous things with Gemini.

I had an idea for a mouth piece you could wear and every, say, 5 seconds it would drip one drop of water into your mouth. That would be an unnoticeable amount, mix with your saliva, and you'd just swallow it without noticing and thus stay hydrated. I asked Gemini what it thought of my idea and it said it was bad and gave me all the reasons why. 1) It would change the chemistry of your saliva and make it less effective. 2) Even though it's just a drop, you could still choke on it if you were heavily exerting yourself or sleeping. 3) Your body has adapted to expect and process a large influx of water all at once. It triggers the stomach to do something and a little drop here and there wouldn't be enough to set it off. And 4) It did the math on how much water that would be in a 24 hour period and it was like around 1 liter and you need more like 3 liters to stay hydrated so it wouldn't even work. Like ... how could you Google that and come up with that answer? Only AI could have that dumb of a conversation about one of my new million dollar ideas. Saved me a lot in R&D costs right there.

I've also used it twice now for shopping. The ball "fell" out of my right earring and getting it back in is basically impossible without a pair of surgical forceps. And even if I could do it, once you've priced the hoop open and closed more than about once, it is never quite circular ever again. So I thought, given that I've had earrings now for like 27 years, maybe it was time to invest in something a little more substantial than the $16 piercing jewelry that's been in there forever. So I asked Gemini what I should do and it found exactly what I wanted. Visually kind of identical, but nicer metal, and no ball. These have a clicker mechanism so I can take them out for things like MRIs and surgeries. And I didn't know what size to get so I measured my existing, but I measured the outer diameter in inches and the website was selling sizes measured by the inner diameter in millimeters. So I told Gemini to do the math given the gauge and size and it did it all flawlessly.

Just this morning I woke up with a crick in my neck again, so I decided to ask Gemini for a suitable replacement for my beloved Indulgence by Isotonic side sleeper that Bed, Bath & Beyond used to sell before they went out of business. And it was like, replacement? Why, they're still sold at major retailers like Macy's and Wal-Mart. WHAT?!? I assure you I scoured the internet for information on the manufacturer and alternate retailers and found nothing. I even posted about it back in 2022. So I guess my prayers have been answered.

It occurred to me though. They're GOING to find a way to monetize this (if they haven't already). You pay them some money and they suggest your product for any related queries above all else and eventually you won't be able to trust it. It'll devolve into a purely for-profit ad-bot and everyone will stop using it just like literally every other tool or platform before it. So I guess use it now while you still can!

I thought today I might talk about the topic du jour, mostly for posterity's sake more than anything else. Maybe in the future I'll read this blog and think, damn what an idiot I was. I'm speaking of course about our overlord and savior, A.I.

I'm kind of a late adopter. I liken it a little bit to when Amazon first came out and people were flabbergasted that I didn't have an Amazon account and I literally never ordered anything from there. I went to the grocery store once a week and I bought everything I needed. Amazon was never going to replace that so the fact that I COULD buy paper towels or aluminum foil online, just didn't really provide me with any benefit, so I never did it. Now I buy things on Amazon like a bad habit. If I haven't received a package in the garage in a few days I start to get sad and look for a little present to cheer myself up.

I'm kind of the same way with AI. People are like, "You don't use AI?!" and I say, "For ... what?" Like literally anything AI can do I can do myself only better. Perhaps not faster. Don't get me wrong, I have started to dabble. Like the blog on my side company's website. I no longer write those. I still come up with the idea for the blog, but then AI cranks it out in 2 seconds because I couldn't care less about the quality there. And I've vibe coded some tools for genealogical purposes for my extended family's organization. But sometimes it's more annoying to vibe code, and takes longer to iron out, than just doing it myself.

I can see how some people use it for emails and shit. Because they don't know how to type. So that could be a major time saver. Just not for me. And also, guys, when you use AI to write an email or a congratulatory message on an ecard or something, it is glaringly obvious that you've used AI and that is a huge insult. So let's resolve to keep interpersonal communications interpersonal.

The bubble around AI is probably prone to pop soon. Not that it won't continue to be amazing and do all kinds of cool shit, but I think the hype is overdone and the financial ROI just won't be there. And then the stock market will come crashing down from its current record heights. Then we'll pick up the pieces and stop trying to shoe horn this shit into every nook and cranny of daily life where it doesn't below.

In the ever-evolving landscape of today’s modern digital era, it is crucial to remember that by fostering a proactive synergy and unlocking your hidden potential, we can truly delve into the heart of the matter—so, without further ado, that’s my two cents, folks! 🚀🌟✨ #Innovation #GrowthMindset

(I asked AI to write my conclusion.)

I cannot for the life of me figure out why people are always trying to get out of jury duty. In my case, at least, I'd always reveled in my ability to skirt my civic duty but only because everyone else was doing the same thing. When I finally stopped to think about it, I realized that jury duty is awesome. And if you're on the bottom rung of a totem pole, not sacrificing your salary, then it's like paid vacation. I was determined right from the beginning to get seated on a jury and campaign to be the foreman.

So you get there and walk into a huge auditorium with thousands of others. And you take an oath and watch an orientation video and then you take a nap. It's supposed to be a cross section of the population and I found it hilariously interesting how true that was. There was just every walk of life in that room. Prime people watching. If you're a people watcher like me, try to get summoned, it was heaven. Everyone has a juror number, mine was #1133. And they call you in groups by your number. So 1-400 go to the fifth floor. But that doesn't mean 400 people are going because only 25% of people answer their jury summons. So I finally got called and I was excited because it was a criminal court -- longer trials.

Then you go upstairs and wait some more. And they're reading through my information card -- age, sex, race -- and compiling a list of 65 out of the 100 or more who are waiting. And the lucky 65 get a clip board with a questionnaire. So I got one. And up to this point is been pure luck, but here's my first real audition. So I start filling out the questions and I think it asked what do you think of the judicial system, what do you think of cops, prosecutors, defense attorneys. And I'm just saying the most bland vanilla things I can. I think it's good, they're good, I have no strong opinion. I answered NO to every single other question that asked if I had been the victim of a crime, known someone who had, had any experience in life that may bias me one way or the other.

And then its into a room for questioning from both the sides. They each get to strike 10 people from being on the jury. So they're trying to find the 10 most opinionated or stupid people by asking pointed questions. The prosecutor asked, "If a bank is robbed but only one person has a gun should everyone involved be charged with armed robbery?" Some people said yes, some people said no. Yours truly said "Well that would depend heavily on the evidence presented. If everyone knew about the gun and it was part of the plan, then yes, but if one guy deviated from the plan and introduced a gun and it can be proven that the others had no prior knowledge, then I would say no." Then the defense attorney got up. He asked me, "What is a reasonable doubt." And I struggled. So he said, "Let me put it this way, if certainty is 100%, what percentage is reasonable doubt?" And I said, "Well, I think maybe the answer you're getting at is 99%? But I'm not sure that even makes sense to quantify that. It's going to rely on concrete evidence and witness testimony lining up in such a way that I'm personally convinced of the truth. But that is going to be unique for each person sitting in this room."

So I'm feeling pretty good. And it worked. I got onto the 12. I was so excited. And I showed up the next day ready to serve but instead all we did was sit in the jury room cracking jokes. 11 lively, funny, and energetic people joined me in this little room and we just had the time of our lives. Around lunch they brought us into the court room and said go home, he took a plea bargain. He had committed 5 robberies at gun point in a short span and had been caught basically red handed. So he was guilty. They were just using us as leverage to get him to take the plea. Afterwards I asked the prosecutor what it was that got us all selected. And she said "Well, it's really a deselection process. None of you said anything to get you deselected." And she pointed out a few examples of things people had said that made them seem impartial. And she added, "And you, Mr. F■■■■. Well, you didn't say ANYTHING that offended ANYONE so you were in like flint." Score.

So I was disappointed to not sit through a long and interesting trial. But I suppose justice was served. I can't wait for my next summons. I'm checking for it daily.

What a weekend! I was livin' it up. I only have 20 minutes before we go get dinner so I'm going to type this as fast as I can. I'll proofread it later so keep your snotty comments to yourselves. Friday night, I went to Etage, this club that is in the big square in town. I heard from some people that it was pretty cool. They were open from 23-5. So I showed up around 11 because I wasn't quite certain how long it would take me to get there and I figured that with the club opening so late everyone would be lined around the block clawing to get in. WRONG. I was like the first person there.

So I sat and had a few beers by myself waiting for everyone to show up. All the clubs here have random gambling tables all around. Like you'll be going down the hall towards the bathroom and its like BAM BLACKJACK! It was very strange but a few people seemed to really enjoy themselves. I stayed away because I have a gambling problem -- my problem being that I suck at it. So there I am at the bar drinking Falcon after Falcon just waiting for somebody to talk to me. When it became evident nobody would, despite my magickal buttefly shirt, I started trying to mingle.

Yeah, people weren't really having it so when this Asian girl winked at me I was like eh, whatthefuck, I'll go talk to her. So I am sitting there with all these chicks from Thailand and I can barely understand a word they're saying. And they drag me out on the dance floor. I definitely did a little pole dancing with this chick up on stage. Tres fun. Then we sit back down at the table to drink some more and she shows me her passport. Specifically, she is pointing at the part that says MR. So I hung out all night with a Thai transsexual and had a really good time. I drank way too much, though, so as I was stumbling home, I see McDonalds like a beacon in the night. I mosdef stopped in at 5am to have a hamburger. I was so drunk I could barely get the words "Bic Mag" out.

I sure did pay for it the next day. One of the worst hangovers I've ever had. I didn't get out of bed until about 4. Then I went for a nice walk and got a nice dinner by myself. It was probably good that I stayed in bed so late because I had many adventures to await me. There aren't really any gay clubs here but there are clubs that have gay nights. And the big one, from what I could gather, was this party called Wonk every Saturday night at Deep. Deep is just a stone's throw from my hotel. But this time I've wised up, and I don't even venture out until 12:30. Surely I won't be the first person there. WRONG! I was the first person there. So I'm standing there alone drinking my beer when this old guy comes and talks to me. Meh, whatever, used to it.

Then the hottest guy I have ever seen walks in and I vowed to myself that I wouldn't leave until I got him. But I've got this elderly baggage, so I'm a little stuck. I tried to tire hime out on the dance floor but he just wouldn't get the hint. And he danced like an old guy. One weird thing they do is hand out candy at clubs. Like a dude with this shirt off comes around with a tray of gummi candies and everyone grabs a handful. So weird. But they had dropped a whole tray right on the dance floor so my shoes are super sticky. Anyway, eventually the old guy tires out and leaves around 3am. This is when I decide to venture up to the karaoke room because I'd watched a little earlier and it was cracking me up.

Wouldn't you know it, the hottest guy ever is sitting on this ottoman watching the show, so I go plop down next to him. I was laughing my ass off because these four girls kept singing a song and the chorus was something "SLUT." And they just keep yelling "SLUT." It was pronounced [sloot] but still funny to me. So I lean over to the hottest guy ever and say, "I have no idea what they're saying but I sure do think its funny." And his eyes lit up and he was like "Where are you from?!" He's one of the first Swedes to give a fuck where I'm from. They're all very unimpressed. So now I've scored 10,000 points for being an American and we're getting along just swimmingly. We're talking and laughing and clappin. I tried to sing along and sound out the words and he thought that was pretty funny. Well... I guess we were having too much fun at other people's expense because the next thing I know, I have a finger pointed at me.

That finger is attached to the biggest person I have ever seen. This is a 7'6" stacked drag queen named Wonk (the namesake of the party) with blonde hair down past her butt ... and she is motioning me on stage. So the hottest guy ever (henceforth to be refered to by his name Rickard -- the k's here do weird things, so it's actually pronounced just like Richard) kind of shoves me up there and I oblige. She says a whole bunch in Swedish and then sticks the microphone in my face and I say, "Uhhhhh ... well, this is my first time to Malmo but it's a lovely city, everyone's just been great." And everyone kinda cheers and she says, "What is your name and where are you from?"

"Okay David from America, I know what you sing. You sing it now. I hope you know it." And I'm like uhhhhh, so do I. Next thing you know, the intro to Don McLean's "American Pie" is on and I start singing it. I'm a little shaky at first but once I found the key I started belting it. I mean belting it. And I knew all the words so I didn't have to stare at the screen, so then I start working the crowd a little. Mind you, it is now like 3:30am and I am a little intoxicated. And I get everyone singin along and I'm singin my little heart out. You all know how much I hate to toot my own horn, but I was pretty good ... probably Grammy quality. So now Rickard is doubly impressed.

Then we go downstairs and talk a while. I bought us some cigarettes out of a machine but I'd never heard of any of them so I just guessed. I ended up guessing his favorite cigarettes so now he's triply impressed. They were called Prince and I told him I'd never had a Prince before. He replied, "You've got one tonight." Zing! Double entendres in a second language, kudos to him!

Then the club started playing slow music. Slow dancing at a gay club? Who woulda thunk. As we were slow dancing which was way too fun, this guy just barrels right through us. And I yell, "HEJ!" and Rickard shoves him, and then he turns around and shoves me. The majority of my bloodstream at this point consists of ethanol and testosterone, so I'm like ready to go. Luckily the Swedes are a peace loving people but I don't think Rickard missed the fact that I'd jumped up to protect him. Can we say quadrupily impressed? Probably like dodechedrimpressed.

The club let out at 5, and Rickard walked me back to my hotel. It was only a block but still a very nice gesture. Yadda yadda yadda, it was a fabulous weekend and I almost wish I could be here another weekend. Stupid me I didn't get his phone number or anything, so I guess that's the last time I'll see him. Oh well, it was worth it.

That's all for now, more anecdotal shit and stories about the douchebag another time. Just had to get that out for your pleasure and my journal. Peace, my sluts!

Went to IHOP late last night to break my diet. Stuffed french toast was worth every carb. Went to bed watching Waking Life. Good flick. Hard to watch when dozing off at 3:00am. It's a thinking movie, not a drinking movie. Woke up with no cough, good news. Woke up (early, as you can see) with pain in neck and shoulders so intense that sleep is not an option. A hot bath did not alleviate any discomfort. Perhaps some yoga will help. Otherwise agony continues. Hope you have fun in church today, suckers.

That time is upon us again, dear friends. That time when David sits down to take another 249 test. Its actually in about 3 hours, so I'm currently taking a brief study break so fill you in on the day's activities. This particular test we are responsible for knowing the entire block diagram (including all registers, signals, and bus widths) for the Parallel Port, the Addressing Unit, Data Unit, and Multiplex Databus Structure. I don't know if you recall, but on the last test that I made a 99 on, it was because I missed one measly little label in the entire UART design. So the chances that I'll miss one measly little label in 4 drawings is a little greater, but I have faith in myself.

The other things we need to know are ring detectors, which are retarded and easy. I'll teach any of you how to do one sometime. The other thing is to list every single addressing mode, there are 8 ... inherent, direct, relative, indexed, 8 bit offset, 16 bit offset, immediate and extended. That's easy enough. Then we have to give an opcode for each, an assembly code command example, and then hand compile it into RAM. That'll be a bitch. And naturally, all of this has to be done in 70 minutes. Wish me luck, you have nots, I am going to attempt again to make a 100 to average out that embarrassing 99. Time to study ... Laaaaaate.