We are almost to the 21st Febrehab in history. This one I think is going to be relatively easy. I decided that the only things I'm giving up besides alcohol are caffeine and sugar. There's a couple of reasons for this. Firstly, I am about 8 lbs lighter than average. Turns out 18 months of health issues are a great diet! So I don't really want to lose weight.

Secondly, this year after having my gall bladder out and being advised to avoid fat, and then having a really bad kidney stone and being advised to avoid oxalates, I hired a dietitian. They were covered by my insurance and I figured that would be a lot easier than doing all the research myself and coming up with a new diet plan. I met with a guy on a zoom call and he seemed really knowledgeable. He laid out what he would do in the way of tracking food, balancing macro-nutrients, and increasing calories, protein, and calcium. Turns out I've been under-eating for years, and not getting nearly enough protein. And even though my kidney stone was made of calcium-oxalate, and I was advised to reduce oxalates in my diet, the other thing you can do is INCREASE calcium. Turns out more calcium in your diet binds up the oxalates before they can get to your kidneys.

Then the douche ghosted me. He never delivered a meal plan. He never spent one second thinking about me after our initial meeting. But ... what he did do was make me think, "Oh that's all you were going to do? I can do that." So I built a spreadsheet and started meticulously tracking what I was eating. Then I made minor adjustments to breakfasts, lunches, and dinners until a week of eating balanced everything out. That included having a protein shake every day, since it's nearly impossible to get enough protein without it. We both think we're seeing a change at the gym since we work out consistently, but perhaps were just starving our muscles previously, and now they are able to grow.

So, I don't feel like abandoning my new healthy balanced diet just to deprive myself for a month. This will be an easy Febrehab as a result. It's not without precedent, but they've been getting harder lately. And last year was the 20th anniversary, so I made it especially hard.

Speaking of 20th anniversaries, tomorrow is my 20th anniversary with Daniel. You believe that? I do. Love you, Daniel! Here's to the next 20.

I said before that I had migrated all of my social media content to posts on SideshoViD.com, but that wasn't entirely true. I had not posted any of my Instagram stories. To be honest, that's mostly because I didn't know I could. I thought that once they disappeared they were gone. But the other day I noticed my "Archives" on Instagram had every story I'd ever posted.

They made it basically impossible to access that content from my laptop, but on mobile, there was a button to click to download the photo or video. I was astounded at how quickly videos were downloaded to my phone and then uploaded to my website. They must be compressed or optimized somehow. It was literally as fast as I could click that they were done. As a result, it only took a few evenings sitting on the couch crunching through them to complete 2018-2024.

The cool thing about that is that there was a period of time, a couple of years even, where stories were the sole format I used. I liked that they were more ephemeral, less pressure, and felt more spontaneous or narrative. So now a huge chunk of time from around 2022-2024 that was previously unrepresented has some history here.

I also like that it took the topic tag for "squirrels" from obscurity to #6 most popular topic. Those were the primary years we spent getting to know Muffin and trying to get her to eat out of our hands. So that is all documented now for posterity. She's here right now in fact having a little breakfast before heading out to work. Look for her to pop up a lot more in the This Day In History section! 🐿

I never thought I would say it. Really and truly, I thought that Febrehabruariii would be the end-all be-all of self-inflicted torture. But I have to admit...

I fuckin love being a vegan.

I was scared that all I would be eating for a month would be celery and carrots. In fact, I bought a massive bag of celery and carrots that is starting to wilt now. By cutting out meats and dairy, I have found a bounty of other foods to eat. Like ... I bought a bunch of roasted almonds and put them in a dish in my kitchen and I snack on them. I'd never eaten an almond before. Not straight up at least. Or my dried apricots. They're better than gummy fruit snacks and so much healthier. I bought a mango last night and after 20 minutes figuring out how to open it up, it was so good. I also got some mango sorbet. I could eat that shit all day. Oh, and I want to thank my good friend JonS■■■ for making sure that i tried humus. It is my new favorite food. I got some at Whole Foods that is tomato basil, kalmato olive, and spinach artichoke. They are all delish. Especially with some alfalfa sprouts sprinkled on top of every bite. Tonight I think I'm going to have some portobello mushroom soup. I can't even begin to tell you how much fun eating has become.

And I have to admit, I feel great. Sure, sure no drinking and smoking has something to do with that, but I really think my diet is the biggest change. And I've lost 3 pounds so far. So I think I'll be able to meet my goal of 150lbs by the end of the month. As a bonus for you all, I took a "before" picture so we can all compare the results when this is all finished. If today were March 1st, though, I would not be having a drink, a smoke, or a cow.

Who knows what culinary adventures lie ahead. I also bought a coconut, and I own a RonCo cleaver, so tonight I will either drink coconut milk or lose a hand. Wish me luck. Laaaaaaaaaaaate.

Last night I had a dream that prom was that night. Somehow I had managed to completely forget about the entire gala. Looking back, maybe it was because I haven't been in high school for damn near six years, but try explaining that to my subconscious. I hastily got ready and went to the dance stag. Open bar, dude! I rationalized with myself that since it was prom, and prom is a big deal, it would be okay if I had one drink. Which led to another, and then another, and then another. As I sat outside enjoying my buzz and finishing off my last cigarette, I contemplated how I was going to justify this transgression to you, my readers -- whether or not I would reset my counter, but knowing ultimately that I had to.

G*d damnit, my brain is starting to wonder where the alcohol is, and it is not going to be happy when it doesn't get it any time soon. The other fun part of my dream is that Yale Chris was there. But he was with his new boyfriend, which in and of itself was not the problem, except that the new boyfriend was his identical twin, and they were dressed the same. And to top it all off, they were doing LSD from a stamp on this other boy's hand since all of his friends from the University of Wisconsin (???) had joined him at Plano's prom. He tried to get me to lick his hand, but I wouldn't. At least I still have SOME integrity in my dreams.

Yesterday somebody asked me if I was going to watch the Super Bull and I got all up on my high horse and was like, "Derrrr, the Super Bull was last week." Whoopsadaisy! Isn't this thing always in the last week of January? It is already fucking Febrehabruary. Get on the ball (no pun intended). So now I'm hoping somebody today will ask me if I'm watching the Super Bull because now I can say, "NO, but I am watching the Supper Bowl!" The Food Network is having a marathon during the silly little game of nothing but Paula Dean. G*d, I love her. How do you like that massage, Mr. Turkey? So my day is full.

And since I am decided NOT hungover this morning, which is odd for a Sunday, I am definitely going to make it to yoga today, which is good news. Then it's on to face a week at work having had no release this weekend. Wish me luck.