Last night we attended a charity gala. I wouldn't say we're exactly gallerinas, but this one was pretty fun. We got some "free" tickets because my dad had made a donation in honor of his late brother, so there was some obligation to go. Plus this is one of the charities I've worked with in my side gig and I know the founder well, so ... we put on suit jackets despite the 100+ temperatures and set out for a warehouse venue near the Galleria.

What was funny is that it was on some random street we've never heard of or seen, and yet just the night before we were like 3 doors down. We went and saw a traveling exhibit of the Trump Epstein Files Reading Room. They printed out all 3 million pages of redacted released files, and put them into volumes on rows and rows of book cases. We promptly started pulling books out and leafing through them looking for a previously unnoticed gold nugget. Some dude came up and said, "I don't think you're actually supposed to touch the books." Which then made us paranoid so we stopped. But it was called "reading room" so I don't get what the hell else you were supposed to do there. It ended up taking like 10 minutes to get thru and then we went to dinner.

Anyway, the gala was fun. It was very inspiring to be in a room full of people who care about other people when that seems to be in low supply these days. Some of the residents of the homeless shelter program even took the mic and spoke about their experiences, which was moving. I got a little emotional when one by one they said how terrible things had gotten that they googled for help and found this organization #1 in the list, because I'm the one that got that all set up and working. So that was cool to remember that things you've done previously can continue to have a ripple effect.

Great meal, good conversations, made a little donation in excess of what we do monthly (and doubled it using my employer), so all in all I'd say it was a wonderful evening.

This is kind of turning into a travel blog, but that's usually the only thing of note going on lately. I'll try to come up with a few different topics here after this. But, we just got back from New Orleans. It was technically my second time there, but first time since I started forming and retaining memories.

The main reason we decided to go now was for Ben's 40th birthday party, which happened to coincide with a big gay festival, Southern Decadence and some big late night party called the Horsemeat Disco. Getting to NOLA is beyond easy. We took Southwest out of Love because Daniel had a leftover flight credit from his short lived stint at the startup and we needed to use it or lose it. We normally will only fly American because we're holding onto gold status by our fingernails these days, but it made sense to this time not to. And boy does that eliminate a lot of stress. Love is down the street, we could practically walk there. And the flight was barely an hour long, so easy.

We really had a nice time in the city. The food is great everywhere we went. Great drinks, good nightlife. The night of Horsemeat Disco we took a little disco nap and made it out. We had purchased new clothes just for the event so we would be ever so slightly appropriately dressed. Turned out we were almost the only ones wearing clothes. Lots of butts hanging out everywhere. It was crowded. It was stinky. You could hardly move much less dance, could hardly talk. All in all, I'd have to say not my scene. But I did my best to hang and have a good time, mostly by imbibing.

The next day we went to the Southern Decadence parade. It was so hot. It was so crowded. It was impossible to do anything, so when our friend Ashley had to head for the airport to get back to her kids, we took it as an excuse to escort her back to our hotel where she'd stashed her bag and then we went to the pool. All in all, I'd have to say not my scene. My scene gets more and more specificity added to it every year. Luckily Daniel agrees.

Our last night we went out to dinner in the French Quarter, had a lovely meal, and then strolled down Bourbon Street on our way back to the hotel. At the end of the street a complete nut job had set up an amplifier with a microphone and had dip shits on either side holding big placard signs letting us all know that we were going to hell. When he saw Daniel and me, he singled us out and started harassing us. Daniel grabbed my hand and we told them to fuck off as we walked by. What a downer at the end of the trip.

It did get me thinking though. The analogous opposite of that just truly doesn't exist. Nobody ever sits outside of churches on Sunday morning with big signs saying "None of this is real!" or "You're all morons!" while someone screams at them in a microphone, "You're not going to heaven when you die dipshit!" So ... looking for volunteers for next Sunday. Let's liberate a few minds from the clutches of Idiocracy!

I'm cheating again and I'm going to backdate this blog. I used to just say sorry I am so late getting around to it, but these days I use my blog like a Time Hop, so I'd rather have a semi-accurate date on it depending on the story I'm telling. But I digress. We just got back from a long weekend in NYC.

We've struggled to find our place there. Different hotels, different neighborhoods, nothing ever really felt right. Well, folks, you'll be as thrilled to hear as I am thrilled to announce - we finally found our home away from home in New York. The Chelsea Hotel. It's this super old building with a rich and storied history of being a haven for artists and musicians. But it's been bought out and turned mostly into a high end hotel. I say mostly because some people still live there, so walking down the hall to our hotel room, we passed two residents' doors. I assume that is occasionally annoying but it probably also basically saved the building so take what you can get. There were three restaurants, and we tried two. Both were fab. And we'd go to the bar at night for courvoisier and freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.

I'd never been to a Broadway show so Daniel got us tickets to two shows while we were there. One was Oh Mary! starring Meg Stalter. I love her to death and she did an amazing job, but ... eh. It was like bawdy and irreverent for the sake of it. I didn't really think it was that CLEVER or anything. Funny enough and we had a great time watching. But ... nothing like our second show Titanique - the telling of the story of the Titanic from Celine Dion's perspective. It was continuously riotously funny throughout with the best music and dancing. Loved it. Loved it.

What else? We went to the Met. Daniel had tried to gaslight me into believing I'd been to the Met before, but I definitely hadn't. Then we walked through Central Park and later on through Hudson River Park, and yowzah the eye candy. I definitely need to step it up or start taking peptides or something. We also saw Davbart and he and Colin took us out to a more traditional Chinese brunch that was completely chaos and then to the Tenement Museum which was super cool and I would def go back to that.

I don't know if New York changed, or if I changed, but I really enjoy it more now than when I was younger. I was even commenting that like nobody was rude the whole time. To us or otherwise. People on the subway said, "Pardon me," when it was their stop. Staff everywhere just super welcoming and friendly. Idk, it is just so enjoyable now where I didn't feel like that 20 years ago. The only thing I didn't like was that EVERY FUCKING ONE was playing Alicia Key's "New York" on repeat. Every store, every pedicab, everywhere you went, you'd sometimes even hear 2 or 3 renditions going on out of sync simultaneously. PEOPLE! There are SO MANY songs about New York. Mix it up!

Then whoosh, we were back home. A super fun little trip for no particular reason. And one we'll hopefully start to do with more regularity.

Well, I happened to notice that today marks exactly one year since my glorious return to SideshoViD.com. I just did a quick inventory and I made 38 posts in that year. That's actually a lot more than I was expecting. Though I have to say the addition of Instagram-like and Twitter-esque formats really helps boost those numbers. I wish I had thought of that back in 2002.

I came back from Spain, felt fine, went to work for a week, etc. Then Saturday afternoon I started to feel kind of shitty. I was sick right before Spain, so given how quickly I was feeling sick again, I decided to do what I never do and go straight to a doctor to get tested and find out what is ailing me. The doctor just called and said my test results were unusual, so it would be easier to explain over the phone (ALWAYS a good sign). I tested positive concurrently for 3 infections - a coronavirus (not COVID), an influenza bacteria (not the flu), and whooping cough? Fuck me. But the good news is a zpack will wipe out both bacteria at the same time, so I guess it's a good thing I went to the doctor straight away instead of waiting 3 weeks to see if it resolved on its own. Maybe I should do that every time I get sick. Is that what doctors are for?

In other news, I've been making minimal efforts to drink marginally less. One way I have done that occasionally is zebra striping. That's where you alternate one alcoholic drink, then one non alcoholic drink. The problem is, every non alcoholic drink sucks ass. They're just juice. Like, don't serve me a glass of juice and call it a MOCKTAIL. That is infuriating. So I went on a quest of my own to make a zero proof cocktail at home. Problem is, fake "liquors" are even worse. They're not even juice, they're just tea. Like literally a weak brewed spicy tea and they call it a whiskey replacement. It's insulting.

Well, folks, I am pleased to report I finally found a good one. I was talking through it with AI, because obviously, and I told it I wanted the bite, the flavor, the viscosity, the burn, the aroma, like everything. And it came up with 3 suggestions. We happened to be at Total Wine this weekend so I bought one of them. I told Daniel, "If this sucks, I'm giving up entirely." But it didn't suck. It's awesome. It's St. Agrestis Phony Negroni. And it pretty much tastes exactly like a real Negroni. Very satisfying and very reassuring that I should check out the other two AI suggestions and maybe get a repertoire going. We'll see, but I'll keep you all posted if I don't die first.

Run! Here comes Hurricane Rita! To the left you'll see the latest image of Hurricane Rita as she approaches the Texas coastline. Damn, she looks delicious. Everyone and their dogs (literally) are evacuating Galveston and Houston. I've heard it's pretty chaotic. I45 is all lanes northbound at the moment. My brother left Houston like 12 hours ago and is just now making it to Dallas. This shit is scary. They say that it could still be a Category 1 hurricane when it hits Dallas. Fuck! We're gonna get flooding rain this weekend. I know it could be worse if I lived on the coast, and I hope everyone there is okay. Luckily, I live on the 3rd floor, so all of my things should be okay, in case you were worried. I probably shouldn't make jokes like photoshopping a devastating storm onto a frosty glass, but meh, what'reyagonnado?

In other noise, my CPAP doesn't work. In a little twist of irony, I managed to acquire myself a little head cold the day that my machine came home with me. My nose is completely stuffed. No air in, no air out, therefore the CPAP does nothing. Sucks. I still haven't gotten to experience real sleep, but as soon as I do, you'll all be the first to know. Oh well, at least I still look like this while I sleep.

Everyone be safe this weekend, get the fuck away from the gulf, and if any evacuees need a place to stay, you're more than welcome to come here. Now let's all go get a 'rita!

Do you ever just have too much to say? So much so that you don't feel like writing it down. That's what happened to me this past weekend. I decided to just sit on my stories for a while, so details that once seemed monumental are now rather trivial. It will make my blog shorter, and the stories more compact.

First things first. My brothers Stephen and Michael, from Houston and Sacramento, respectively, both visited. Their wives came as well. Stephen brought Kaylyn around so Michael could meet her, to avoid having to introduce himself to her on her 13th birthday. I just loved this picture. I assure you, she was well nutured and attended to all weekend, but this picture is so something my fam would do. 'Ahh, just prop her up, she'll be alright.' It was cute though. It was really good to see everyone that came to dinner on Friday night. I supplied the dessert -- peach cobbler from Marshall's BBQ. Oh man, is it ever good. I made everyone try it, even if they didn't want to. I also passed around my shock lighter. That was some good entertainment there. By the end of the night, we had 11 people around the table holding hands, while Stephen and I grabbed the lighter simultaneously. Everyone around the circle felt the shock. It was hilarious.

That night I went out to the bars, but wasn't really having much fun. Ryan S■■■ and I decided to just go back to his place and go to sleep. When we got there, however, I coerced him into having one drink before bed. Which turned into two ... then three ... then we lost count. Much squeezy vodka was ingested despite Ryan's attempt to fall asleep. We watched Romy and Michele's High School Reunion, our favorite movie. Since the last time I saw it, I learned all the state capitals. So when they're at the reunion and Toby Dumbfuck asks them to name all the capitals and the Frinkazoid starts off with 'Albuquerque' I KNEW that was NOT the capital of New Mexico, because everyone knows that's Santa Fe. So we called everyone we knew to tell them that and even convinced Jason and Levi to come have a drink with us. We were beyond wasted, but obviously so much fun.

Saturday night I went out with Lil Jarrod. We had a blast. He is one of my new favs ... too funny. It was so damn crowded because this weekend was Pride. You could barely move and getting a drink was an impossibility. Ryan S■■■ got fed up with the crowds and left unannounced, so our plan to stay at his place overnight was soon liquidated. Bob and his brother and friends were in the bars too. Too good to see him! We had fun all night long and then set about trying to decide where to go. Even though I had like three Long Islands and about six beers, I was feeling adventurous so we turned toward Plano. But I can't go home because my parents set a big wake-up-the-neighborhood alarm when they go to bed. So we eventually ended up in Lewisville at Lil Jarrod's apartment. I slept on his couch and hope I didn't scare his sister in the morning. I don't think I did though because she was quite lovely and it was nice to meet her.

From there we went back downtown to the Pride Parade. I'm sorry, but I love Pride. I don't care how many people are too cool for school. It is my favorite holy day, second only to Thanksgiving. I fought for beads as best I could, and even caught some, a feat not to be overlooked. I got some sun -- so hot, saw tons of people I knew, hung out with Lil Jarrod and Marc, got to go to Hamburger Mary's for the first time and meet some new people. All in all it was a wonderful day. I was sunburned and exhausted when I got home, and since then I have been in the most inane training class at work. It is downright painful. But, persevere I will.

This weekend I am going to College Station with Ryan H■■■■. We are going to watch some ring dunkings. I'm not positive who it was but I wanna say Daniel. So I won't have my car but I will have my phone so call me and meet up with. Alright, sluts, I'm out of here. I gotta go work out because I'm morbidly obese. Peace!

Hey kids. Boy have I ever not been in the mood to blog lately. That just happens sometimes, y'know. Like you get into the groove of blogging nearly every day for a long time and then suddenly its the last thing you wanna do with your time. Anyway, I'm back now. You've sure missed out on a lot of good stuff, but thats half the fun of me not blogging is you not knowing whats going on, so instead of trying to catch up, I'm just gonna talk about yesterday.

I woke up a little hungover so I spent the morning eating a nice breakfast I cooked for myself, drinking water and juice, and taking a shower. I felt much better after that, and it was such a beautiful day that I couldn't help but be in a really good mood. Keith and Matt left for Dallas to go to the Who concert so I had the place to myself. I decided to turn off the AC, open up all the windows and turn on all the fans. Not only did I air the place out but it felt so good. I had the digital cable music station blaring as I vacuumed and dusted and disinfected. The place is currently spotless. We'll see how long that lasts. So when I was done, I decided to get ready to go to the football game against Vergina Tech. I like to wrap my knees to facilitate standing thru the entire game, so I did the tight ace bandage, metal supported brace combination. No one knows I'm wearin it though cause my overalls go right over it. Man was it hot at the game, especially in these overalls. But it was so fun. Well, besides the fact that we had 3 über-bitches standing next to us all in a huff cause they thought we were in their seats. Whatever. It was just me and Allison so instead of trying to squeeze into our seats, we just took some empty room a few rows back. It wasn't a big deal though, cause they were only there for one quarter and we left before halftime to go down for senior yell so they were only bothering us for like 8 minutes.

Senior Yell was awesome. We went down and lined up and I saw so many people I knew down there. It was like a little '03 reunion. We got to go down on Kyle Field while the Fightin' Texas Aggie Band was doing their show. Then we did two yells and welcomed the Aggies back onto the field. I could have SWORN I was on the jumbo-tron, but so far no one had seen me. The guy with the camera was panning our faces and I had the camera RIGHT in my face for a few seconds, so if it was on the jumbotron then I was too. If you saw me, please let me know. After that they herded us off the field and we went and found a new place to stand in some room of people that left after the band played. The game kinda sucked, mostly cause we lost, but I still had a blast. I got really sunburned in the face, like I knew was gonna happen. But despite all that, it was too fun. Certainly better than sitting up in one of those boxes. Thats just a random opinion of mine, not directed toward anyone.

After that, my brother Stephen was in town, so he came over to see my place. Then we went to go eat at Rockfish. Once again, I ate seafood and enjoyed it. We both got seafood enchiladas. I also ate a shitload of peanuts. Blech. Anyway, I also had a couple beers with dinner, and then stuffed myself with enchiladas, so when we got back we laid around and watched TV, and then Stephen went back to Houston. Almost needless to say, immediately I fell the fuck asleep for a good couple of hours. Allison finally woke me up by coming over to see what I was doing since I wasn't online, and I wasn't answering my phone. Then I went over to her place and watched Super Troopers. It was a pretty funny movie, I would recommend it to all of you without hesitation. After that I got online for a while, did some real nice chatting, drank a couple beers. Keith got home and we went to Taco Cabana at like 4am. Good times, I haven't done that in a while. Now its Sunday and here I am. I don't have shit to do today, so I ain't gonna worry about nothing. Maybe I'll go lay out or something. You know how I do. Anyway, now you're all up to speed, no more complaining. Czech you skillets later.

Oh, and download the new song of the day. Its the JAM, seriously.