We are almost to the 21st Febrehab in history. This one I think is going to be relatively easy. I decided that the only things I'm giving up besides alcohol are caffeine and sugar. There's a couple of reasons for this. Firstly, I am about 8 lbs lighter than average. Turns out 18 months of health issues are a great diet! So I don't really want to lose weight.

Secondly, this year after having my gall bladder out and being advised to avoid fat, and then having a really bad kidney stone and being advised to avoid oxalates, I hired a dietitian. They were covered by my insurance and I figured that would be a lot easier than doing all the research myself and coming up with a new diet plan. I met with a guy on a zoom call and he seemed really knowledgeable. He laid out what he would do in the way of tracking food, balancing macro-nutrients, and increasing calories, protein, and calcium. Turns out I've been under-eating for years, and not getting nearly enough protein. And even though my kidney stone was made of calcium-oxalate, and I was advised to reduce oxalates in my diet, the other thing you can do is INCREASE calcium. Turns out more calcium in your diet binds up the oxalates before they can get to your kidneys.

Then the douche ghosted me. He never delivered a meal plan. He never spent one second thinking about me after our initial meeting. But ... what he did do was make me think, "Oh that's all you were going to do? I can do that." So I built a spreadsheet and started meticulously tracking what I was eating. Then I made minor adjustments to breakfasts, lunches, and dinners until a week of eating balanced everything out. That included having a protein shake every day, since it's nearly impossible to get enough protein without it. We both think we're seeing a change at the gym since we work out consistently, but perhaps were just starving our muscles previously, and now they are able to grow.

So, I don't feel like abandoning my new healthy balanced diet just to deprive myself for a month. This will be an easy Febrehab as a result. It's not without precedent, but they've been getting harder lately. And last year was the 20th anniversary, so I made it especially hard.

Speaking of 20th anniversaries, tomorrow is my 20th anniversary with Daniel. You believe that? I do. Love you, Daniel! Here's to the next 20.

I said before that I had migrated all of my social media content to posts on SideshoViD.com, but that wasn't entirely true. I had not posted any of my Instagram stories. To be honest, that's mostly because I didn't know I could. I thought that once they disappeared they were gone. But the other day I noticed my "Archives" on Instagram had every story I'd ever posted.

They made it basically impossible to access that content from my laptop, but on mobile, there was a button to click to download the photo or video. I was astounded at how quickly videos were downloaded to my phone and then uploaded to my website. They must be compressed or optimized somehow. It was literally as fast as I could click that they were done. As a result, it only took a few evenings sitting on the couch crunching through them to complete 2018-2024.

The cool thing about that is that there was a period of time, a couple of years even, where stories were the sole format I used. I liked that they were more ephemeral, less pressure, and felt more spontaneous or narrative. So now a huge chunk of time from around 2022-2024 that was previously unrepresented has some history here.

I also like that it took the topic tag for "squirrels" from obscurity to #6 most popular topic. Those were the primary years we spent getting to know Muffin and trying to get her to eat out of our hands. So that is all documented now for posterity. She's here right now in fact having a little breakfast before heading out to work. Look for her to pop up a lot more in the This Day In History section! 🐿

I don't know if you've noticed the conspicuous omission of any posts about Febrehab this year. It's not that I'm not doing -- I am. It's just that it's really not much of a challenge this year. I really don't drink a whole lot these days. And, I wasn't going to mention this publicly, just in case, but now I think it's pretty official: I quit smoking 6 months ago.

Right when we got back from Owen's wedding when I wasn't feeling well, I didn't smoke and then I just kind of figured I would keep it going just for the hell of it. So now that's that. I don't foresee myself ever going back to it. I don't even miss it.

But that does kind of take the fun out of rehab if you're not addicted to anything. But this year I am trying to focus on sleeping more, so I've moved my bedtime up to 10:30pm. I do not stay up past that for any reason. And the other side challenge is to do something cultural in Dallas each weekend in February. So yesterday JennyC■■■ came into town and we went with her to the Dallas Museum of Art. Got some general admission passes and walked around and looked at art. She'd been there 100 times, Daniel had been a few times, but I've never been. It was a really fun way to spend the afternoon. Then we came back and chit chatted for a while and then Jenny had to leave.

So far so good, just not a lot to report so I've kind of forgotten to keep the blog up to date, but you're probably getting used to that these days, no?

Man, almost a whole week has gone by and I haven't had a single craving for meat, booze, or cigarettes. What a complete let down. Febrehab is all about the masochism and this year it's been completely lacking. Although I gradually transitioned out of veganism into Taco Cabana last year, I still have kept many of my favorite vegan meals in the regular rotation. So when February rolled around this year, I just bought all the ingredients for all of those and noticed very little transition into the clean and wholesome.

But all of that is about to change.

I had to delay my master cleanse by one day so that the first day would fall on a Saturday. The logistics of mandatory meetings at work and stuff just didn't fit in with the cleanse. So I'm still doing it for 2 weeks, just shifted back a day. I cannot wait. I am all set up. I bought a scale today that measures weight, body fat percentage, body water percentage, muscle mass, BMI, and basal metabolic rate. It's pretty sweet. And naturally, I built a sweet spreadsheet to track everything. Then I set up the tripod in the other room so I can take daily pictures during the cleanse. If I lose like 20 lbs, then I can put the pictures together into an animated gif that shows me wasting away. I also bought myself this ridiculously massive thermos to carry around my lemonade concoction all day. I am so psyched. Everyone keeps asking me what would happen if.... What happens if I get hungry or sick or invited to dinner. They don't realize the extent I will go to.

I'm going to try to post more during the cleanse because that's interesting. So far the Febrehab has been boring. But, more on that, after this....

It was the best of sobriety; it was the worst of sobriety. I've officially made it a week. To be honest, I wasn't sure it was going to happen. This is harder than I remember. Day 3 is always the worst (obviously, read the last post). Day 7 though is when the physical addictions have quieted down to a murmur and the habitual addictions come screaming to the surface. Today I was on the A&M campus doing some recruiting for about 2 hours. I rode down and back to be there for 2 hours. Lame, I know. But just walking across campus made me want a cigarette so much that the hair on the back of my neck stood up. I resisted, though, don't worry. I am still participating in Febrehabruarii, as is Mr. Brett Sabulous. I guess everyone else is out ... since you can't start after the Super Bull.

Really this past week has been nothing short of a roller coaster for me. Some days I just feel fucking amazing and the next I'm really, really low. I've had a lot of fucking fun, and I've missed out on a lot. I'm not all that pleasant to be around ... sometimes ... and you never know when that time is. I've given up so much that sometimes it's hard to remember all the things I'm not doing. What I am doing, though, is working out like a mofo. To date, I've lost 7 pounds. That's a pound a day, retards. I should write a book.

So, I was on a high earlier, now I'm on a low. Give me five minutes or another triple shot venti cappuchino and I might be on a high again. Until then, go fuck yourself.

Yoga yesterday was wonderful. It was just me and three foreign middle-aged women, on account that the class was during the Super Bull. I was sweating rather profusely, as it is hot yoga, and since there were very few people there (and the male instructor is essentially nude already) I decided to take my shirt off. Now, you all KNOW how much I hate to toot my own horn, but I just wanted to share with you that while I am still morbidly obese, my working out has begun to spring the roots of progress into my mounds of fatty flesh. I think I'm starting to improve, and that is such good incentive to keep going, since my workout partner has disappeared for the past 2 weeks and has vowed to disappear at least one more. I still haven't missed a day though. Toot! Toot!

So far so good on the sobriety experiment. The only problem is that I've become increasingly irritable. I blame that more on the cigarettes than anything. I just don't like it when people try to tell me what Febrehabruary is. I made the fucking rules for me, for me to follow, not for you to assess. I am slowly withdrawing to protect my original decree of 28 days of no drinking. I'm afraid that by the end of this, I will have no friends. But I will persevere. Little things have just been annoying me more than they normally would.

It's like when somebody tells you that going from 2 packs of cigarettes a day down to a pack a week "doesn't count." And then pokes you... repeatedly....

But I did have a wonderfully productive weekend. Waking up at 10 feeling fully refreshed and ready to tackle the day was a welcome respite. And feeling tired on Saturday night meant that I curled up in my PJs with my laptop, when normally I would have feel obligated to go out. So there is good associated with the whole thing. I talked to AllieD last night, and asked her how Jamey did it. Jamey, her squeeze, gave up alcohol for 2004. The whole fucking year. He said I would be done with my experiment long before the hurt went away. So that was encouraging.

You'll notice I also have scads more time to update my webpage. I should be at Studio Movie Grill right now, but instead I think I'll go to the gym. Peace out, have-nots!